Into the last quarter of 2011

Burnt, choked, suffocated, stressed, lost, trashy, failure, giving up, worried, miserable, weariness, etc etc. List down all the negative adjective you know and that spell my current situation.

Now, really. Why can't this study matter get over? Why must it keep bugging me? I can't move on with life when I have incomplete papers tagging along.

It is never easy to do revision. The passion is fading, energy level is low, focus is not straight but temptation of the world seems attractive.

Oh God, how do I work and study at the same time. Will it work out this time? Will I complete the final 2 papers this time round? Will I see 2 passes in my result slip?

Oh God, I want to be a diligent employee. A person who does things best, accurate and just up to the expectation. But how? Sometime, I just do not know how. It is like a dead end, no solution. Worse, my immediate superior is the most difficult people to deal with in the company. The learning process is hard and I understand this. But God, this is way too hard for me to take on.

God, how? Show me, please.
God, how do I trade my sorrow with joy?
God, how do I live under stress?
How?
How?
How?

TT

Ouch!

Ouch! It hurts! Once again! It is even more hurtful this time because it happens once again.
But, every trial makes a person stronger.
Is that so?
Well, not for me,
for now,
at this moment,
at least.

I didn't make it to graduate. I didn't clear any paper I sat for last sitting either. That's bad!

In this situation, joining the work force is no longer a wise decision because I have 3 outstanding papers. Unless, I choose to postpone my studies. Another suggestion is that to do one paper at a time while working. Wait a minute! May I know which employer would be kind enough to give such a person a shot? Maybe. However, the job scope given wouldn't be the kind of job scope designed for graduate. Looking at my current job, which is temporary, I don't think it is getting me anywhere good. Ironically, I really hope I'm wrong when I say this. Am I too proud when I talk like that?

Next option is going back to class, with the same lecturers, same class jokes, same notes, same exercises, etc... unless, of course, I choose to go for different lecturer this time, which is allowed. The truth is, I don't have any space left in my heart to attend class.

Try another option, self-study. I would have to do it in kl. Malacca is not a good place, the study environment is just not conducive, especially with babies around! My family couldn't agree more with this statement. Self-study in kl means very less friends, no internet access, lesser entertainment due to lack of peers to hang out, etc... Aren't these 'the' criteria to go full force in studies? Come on people, be honest! I admit I feel lonely staying in such an environment.

So, what now? I need to decide fast! Registration for June sitting will be due by mid of next month.

The atmosphere is undeniably negative.

God, please guide!

100!!!

I came to realize this is my 100th post!!! Great!

I want to thank those who have read my blog all this while , those who have dropped some lovely messages and even those who think this is a plain boring blog.

Results for Dec 2009 sitting of ACCA examination was released yesterday.

I passed, ALL! Praise the Lord everyone! This is my first time passing all attempted subject in ACCA journey! A miracle! Shame on me that I let myself believe such a miracle could not happen! Hey, you have no idea how scared I was okay? I cried one day before results day. =.=

The miracle,

F5 Performance Management
This is my 4th attempt. Grr! but got more than just a pass Phew! A big relieved!

P2 Corporate Reporting
I did about 80/100 marks during exam. I have no idea how to tackle the last question and I don't even have to time to think. Honestly, I sucked up my tears because there were many people in the hall. =.= Then I came back crying. T.T but, I got just a pass. I am thankful that I don't have to look at all those annoying IASs again, for now. Given the same question paper to me right now, I don't think I know how to do. =/

P3 Business Analysis
This paper was fairly okay. I rushed through the whole paper though. I got just a pass as well.

From the results above, many of my comrades said that I am so lucky. Luck huh? My lady luck? Nope, I will still say, this is A MIRACLE!!!

Do you see a smile on my face now? I am sure you did! =)

Dad once 'prophesied' that I will do better in final level, which is call professional level. In this case, half of his 'prophesy' is fulfilled. lol

Are you wondering why am I so happy for getting just a passed? Well, before you make any not so wise judgment, go around and ask people from business field and listen to what they have to say about ACCA.

And now, the race goes on. I am left with final 3 papers to graduate. If I passed all again this time round, I will graduate in August 2010. I am looking forward to it! Oh, come on, come on!

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I am dating ACCA examination in June 2010, wish me all the best!

P1 Professional Accountants
P4 Advanced Financial Management
P7 Advanced Audit and Assurance

However, I still need -
wisdom
discipline
determination
faith
hope
prayer

PRESS ON!!!

Wake me up when September ends

The end of September gives different meaning to different people.

For some western countries, it means the end of summer.

For some corporate organizations, it means the end of the 3rd quarter of the year. It is time for performance evaluation of the quarter and forecasting of budget for the next quarter.

For some, it is just another day.

For me, it is time to get back on the study track and start running. Studies get harder at final stage!

Nevertheless, I thanked God that I survived my full 3 months of life here. :) Ahem, though it is plain nothing. But it is still better than something bad happen.

Focus!

3 in Dec 2009

Hohoho!

It's the Attitude and not Aptitude that determines one's Altitude.

So true!

I got my result today.

F5 Performance Measurement
Expected to fail. So it failed. It just 2 marks away to pass. I dislike this subject! This is not good. This will be my 4th attempts. Grrrr.....

F6 Taxation
Expected to pass. So it passed. By 2 marks. ^^v

F8 Audit and assurance
Expectation is 50:50 and I passed! The highest marks I ever get in my entire ACCA exam in only one attempt. However, many people failed this subject. I like this subject and I think that helped.

It's time for a change of attitude towards F5.

Press on!!!

I'll see you in exam hall in the month of Dec 2009,

F5 performance Measurement
P2 Corporate Reporting
P3 Business Analysis

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I thanked God for my results. Special thanks to all who have been supportive all this while. I will do my best in coming exam!

The playlist

I was caught singing the old song again moments ago. Some familiar songs of uncertainty from the playlist started playing itself in my mind as if someone click on the 'play' button.

@#%&*^$!!!
Result is out soon!!!
T.T
There are countless of butterflies in my stomach!!!

With a snap of the fingers, somebody click on the 'next' button and a song of comfort is being played.

The lyrics goes like this,

He will keep you strong to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ.
God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful.
1 Corinthians 1:8-9

Yeap, He is faithful at all times.

Chill sherene! Chill! And be patient!

Question mark (?)

Exam is over. *wipe sweats

And it leaves me with a lot of question marks.

I need rest!!!

*Lie flat on the bed

no curse no swear

I found this in a friend's blog.

"When you are doing something that you don't like,
you are growing."

I super don't like F5 Performance Measurement.

My roommate once said, I cursed and swore every time I study this subject. O.o
Not literally curse and swear la...
As in cannot sit still to focus, groan a lot, sigh a lot and etc....
But I cannot run away from studying this subject no matter how or what.

I'm revising this subject today, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow then attend 4 days of revision class from 10am to 5pm each day in kl. Can I do it?

It brings me back to this,

Sherene boleh! Tuhan paling boleh!
Move it! Move it! Move it!

^^v

facebook

I didn't achieve my study plan for tuesday and today, wednesday.

Facebook some more la!!!





It should be face book!!!







Aduh!!!

And right now sleepiness creeps in.
Yea, so darn it right?
Always with excuses.

Failed on tuesday and wednesday does not means failing in the days to come.
Just move it and study.
Sherene boleh! Tuhan paling boleh!

The A

A smile from friends revived my spirit.
A step out of the room could brighten up my day.
A bite of whiskey filled chocolates is the booster of my study mood.
A heartfelt gratitude to my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ for such a sweet blessing. :)

Yay, off to study now.

-Exam is 33 days away from today.-

Savour it

Savoring the process despite of pek-chek-ness.

Studies matter again.

Grrr...

It reminded me of ICF committee members trying to do the confusing eyes cum smiling pose.

Hmm...
(how come this pic looks so blur here? any expert out there?)

Erwin, the guy in the middle did the best. :)

Can two different things see eye to eye? Or an eye for an eye? o.o

The eye

Strike a balance. It's a skill. Master it.

Opps!
I exceeded my sleeping time.
8 hours class tomorrow in kl
arghhhh
snooze off

Classes on Sunday

Classes on Sunday.
I dislike that.
It is such an agony and anguish. Exaggerate huh?
I started to miss the time of me going to church every week without failing.
Going to church is not a mere mundane routine.
It is about giving, offering, having fellowship and worshiping the One who've got the whole world in His hands, as a congregation.
But what can I do? Protest?
The system has been like that all the while and everyone has accustomed to it.

"Sunday classes vs studies vs bearing a good testimony" How to come to a conclusion?

Argument 1:
If I skip all Sunday classes, I will miss out a lot and cannot fully understand the subject matter. Thus, will cause me to under perform in exam. (Warning: High failure rate in ACCA examination!)
Argument 2:
If I choose to go Sunday classes, I will not be able to be at church which is bad.

Both give a negative answer.

So what could I say
And what could I do
But commit all this oh God
Completely to You
*lyrics edited*

Still waiting

They are waiting.
Till they were too tired and have fallen asleep.

Sound like Peter,James and John during the transfiguration?

As I crawl all the way to complete ACCA.
The road seems rough. Aiks!
I do not want to be caught complaining, ranting and raving.
I do not want to be like them.
Stop crawling, that is for kiddo.
I'm a big girl now.
So run, jump and kick!

It's time to get serious in studies.
I failed 2 and passed 2.
Going to inform parents about it in a few hours time.
What would they say?
I have indeed disappoint them. Haiz.
I've always expected scolding from them whenever result are bad.
Instead they offer words of encouragement.
Papa, mami, mei, ah jas, you all are the best!
God, I pray that You'll truly bless them.

Pre 16th of Feb 09

I'm anxiously waiting for result........again.
Sigh.
Tension man!
I need peace, alot alot.
This verses ran through my mind.

Phi 4:6 In nothing be anxious; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
Phi 4:7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus.

Amen!

Movie - The Climb

Date: 7th February 2009 ( Saturday )
Time: 7pm onwards
Venue: Nilai Gospel Chapel
Event: Movie Screening-The Climb (A not too old and not too new movie)

Synopsis: “The Climb” is a story of two solo rock climbers, Michael Harris (Ned Vaughn) and Derrick Williams (Jason George), who are brought together when they perform a daring rescue. The man they save is the son of retail mogul Mack Leonard (Dabney Coleman) who rewards Michael and Derrick by sponsoring a trip to their dream climb at Mount Chicanagua. The two highly esteemed climbers approach the sport very differently. Michael is a safety-conscious plodder driven by the beauty of creation. His goal is to reach the summit, and take whatever precautions necessary. Derrick is a flamboyant self-promoter bent by anger. He's a risk taker and will reach his dream at any cost. A clash of pride, styles, and character put both of their lives on the line.

Ok, I'm not a sales representative of this movie. =.=
Besides that, when I googled this movie, there are more than one 'The Climb' movie.
So misleading!

Findings: Of all the scenes in this movie. there are one scene that speak a lot of me. The part where both of the climber reached the top of the mount. The white guy inserts a cross at the peak of the mountain. Then, he takes off his wedding ring and put it at the cross. This white guy loves his wife so much. His wife died in an accident. He could even remember the exact day of him living without his wife around when he is being asked by the black guy. The black guy said to him that he should let healing takes place in his heart. I cannot remembered the exact text line. It's something like this.

Applications: For me leh, it is about my studies. How come I fail? There are a few possibility that I can think off. Maybe I'm not well prepared. Or things happened for a reason. Well, I'm hurt deeply that is for sure. 2 times failing! Can you imagine that? It ruins my testimony for Christ and conficence. It caused me my relationship with God. All go down to the drain. Life have to move on no matter what. I must leave this baggage behind because it slower down my speed to move forward. How do I do it? By putting everything on the cross. Every hurt and disappointment, bring it to my Lord Jesus Christ. Let him carries them for me because he handles things better.

Changes: Result will be out in one week time. My confidence of getting all pass is 50:50. I do not know what to expect. An all P word would bring a huge changes in my life and direction. At the same time, one F word would change things too. I want to be healed and move on. Nevertheless , Lord, may Your will be done!


Hwei, why la we blog at the same time?
And why la we choose to blog and not studying?
Because we both woke up late today.
Because we both had a power packed weekend.
^^

Erm....err...
I never really touch much on F5 and F7.
Yucks!
Because I'm right here blogging.
Ooo....
Had nightmare for the past 2 days. All the scenes from violent, bloody, gory and horror movie become alive!
Watch Jumaji? Ya, like that. Everything just popped out.
*pop*
My fellow soldier, including me are getting exhausted over this war.
Hold on people! Hold on sherene!
Just a few days more to fight this war and we are free from bondage.
Temporarily...
So at the moment, no matter how is the weather like, we have to chiong ar!!!
Everyone has changed their facebook status from bad to worst!
Eg1. Study hard hard, die hard hard!
Eg2. xxx is down, audit win liao!
and many more....
For me, I've set it as: "Sherene is in a faith vs fear battle! Who will win?"
Pek check aura is indeed arising!
We are not greedy at all. All that we want is just to pass.
Yes, just a pass will do.

A dead end I see when I study F5.
A ray of hope I see in F6, F7 and F9 if I do not study F5.
Ignore F5?
It will be a forever dead end then.
Study F5?
It shatters the hope of F6, F7 and F9.
I'm clueless in F5.
Lord, teach me!

Changed

I am a changed person.

Thanks to Un. Andrew who had helped me out.

I have been praying over this matter day and night without ceasing and faithfully. Right now, God kept His promise and had provided me a way out.

I just have to play my part. Trust. Faith. Discipline. Hardworking. Do my best. Priority.

I guess I will not post, ok, maybe less emo-ed study blog that frequent anymore. It is because I know I can manage it with the help from above. I have extra power!

I skipped

Problem:
-I skipped class! 3 days in a row! All 8 am class!
( This is my free class, so no attendance will be taken. )

Causes:
-De-motivated to go to class and listen all over again the same thing.
-New classmate ( I have problem socializing? )

Finding:
-I do not have the motivation to attend class but I have the motivation to study. ( Does it sounds right to you? )

Recommendations:
-Do not attend class at all since I have already listen once through. However, what if I missed something important like exam area for this sitting?
-Going to class only when there is a need? Like to ask question or to listen only that specific chapter.

Conclusions:
-Loss
-I don't know
-Others will have bad impression on me for skipping class every now and then. Not all. Those who had fail before will understand how I feel.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

I blog a lot this month. I need to write it down. I need to tell it to someone. It's better than to throw tantrum on people. Right Sherene? Yea.

The road to passing is full of obstacles, it is thorny, it is obnoxious, it is long, it is drying, it is definitely not a good path to trod on.

Right now, I can only think of one verse.

Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God." Mark 10:27

Father, may Thou remove all the stumbling block that is preventing me to move forward. It is because all things all possible with thee that I decided to put my trust in thee. Help me to move on rather than being bothered by all these lies than the devil is trying very hard to inject into me. Help me to believe that this time round of exam is indeed passable for I trust only in thee. Amen!